Fundamentals To Habit Forming
Wikpedia’s definition of Habits:
Habits are routines of behavior that are repeated regularly, tend to occur subconsciously, without directly thinking consciously about them. Habitual behavior sometimes goes unnoticed in persons exhibiting them, because it is often unnecessary to engage in self-analysis when undertaking in routine tasks. Habituation is an extremely simple form of learning in which an organism, after a period of exposure to a stimulus, stops responding to that stimulus in varied manners. Habits are sometimes compulsory.
A question you have probably asked yourself as some point in time, as most people do at some stage in their life is, "how do I form good habits and change bad ones? ".
One thing we all know is, habits are hard to break.
One writer said it best.
The chains of habit are generally too small to be felt until they are too strong to be broken. ~Samuel Johnson
Very well put. It seems to be the way it works, doesn’t it? Your not sure how a bad habit started but one day you realize, "this is not a good thing I am doing". At that point it is usually pretty hard to stop whatever the bad habit is. Even after you tell yourself you want to stop.
How bad are bad habits for us? Are good habits just as good?
It’s been said that our habits, good or bad, are what make us who we are. If this is the case then forming some good habits would be a positive thing to do when trying to align ourselves with how we want to be. Some people want to be just the way they are, I understand that. This article would not be for them. But, if you are looking to make some changes, positive one’s, keep reading.
Take Inventory
Its really about working on improving the quality of life. Shaving some stuff here and adding some stuff there. An inventory of what works and what doesn’t is where it starts. You need to do some evaluation. Some habits are blatently obvious in the, ‘need to change’, category. Others are a little more difficult to spot. In fact, as hard as it may be, especially for me, you might ask the people nearest to you to give you some feedback. In my experience, they are usually very willing to participate in this exercise.
You can start off by asking them what things they would change in their life, if they could. Then you might let them know what you are doing and ask them to point out some things they notice about you. You might even ask them to join you on the journey to change some of these bad habits they have just pointed out about you and desire to change about themselves.
You might end up with a workout partner, you never know.
After you get your list of things you would like to change, don’t forget to make a list of things you would like to keep. Remember it’s an inventory, good and bad. One of the big reasons you do the ‘good inventory’ is so you can see how things are matching up or contradicting each other. For example: You are eating very healthy foods but you are not exercising. That would be a miss-match.
Once you have established your list of changes to be made its time to priortize the list. I believe success breeds success and it’s important to establish a priority list of most important and easily achievable down to least important and hardest to achieve.
There are couple of things accomplished with this step. You are committing your thoughts to the written word. It is more powerful and harder to hide from. The second thing it does is allow you to put a plan together about what can be worked on now and achieved first. This will prepare you for some success and allow you to hone your habit breaking and forming skills a bit.
What habit do you choose to break/form first. Choose One
I would suggest taking on one habit breaking, forming project at a time. Especially starting out. This will allow you to focus on the one goal and not get overloaded with multiple tasks to accomplish which can lead to failing and giving up.
The first habit breaking/forming project should be one that would mean a lot to you and bring about noticeable positive change to your world but not cause you to feel a lot of pressure or anxiety to implement. A good example would be gettting into better shape or eating healthier or going to church regularly.
30, 90, 180, 365 days to a new habit
I think we have all heard somewhere that new habits will be formed if performed for the 30 days. I think there is a lot of merit to that but it does not mean that it is clear sailing just because you did something for 30 days. If you don’t stay focused after the 30 day mark you are likely to revert back to your old habits. Maybe not instantly but over time they will sneak back into your life. 30 days is still a great milestone in your project and one that can be the catalyst to beginning another one when reached with the current project.
To have benchmarks along the way to check your status is the best way to make sure you are on course. You can reevaluate your progress and assess your consistency as the milestones are met. Having time marks along the way keeps you focused and motivated.
Stay Positive
Forming new habits and breaking old ones is tough work. Staying focused and in the mindset that this is a positive life changing project is important. Keeping a good attitude and minimizing the amount of negative energy around you is a major key to your success or failure. One of the things you need to keep in check is your positive meter. If you start to feel negative try to figure out why. If its due to some people around you, try to change that by minimizing the time you spend with them and spend more time with positive minded people. If its other things you recognize as negative influences figure out what they are and implement a plan to minimize, eradicate or change the occurences. i.e. Read self-help books, find blogs that motivate you, join like minded groups, walk down by the river. Do whatever it takes to put yourself in a good mindset and you will improve your chances of achieving your goals.
Begin Today
You can put these action items into motion today. Take out a piece of paper make a giant "T" on the page. On one side write down the things that you do that you like about yourself and what you do in your life. On the other side write down the things that you would like to see some change. Spend about 20 minutes alone and in good thinking space. Tomorrow take out the list and do it again. Its that simple. Take action and you will see change.
Keep me posted on your progress.
